Oak Hills, UT August 1958 J. R. Eyerman

Saturday, April 24, 2010


Buying stock on the Movies:  Sure thing or sucker bet?

Good afternoon, Ladies and Gentlemen and welcome to Arlington Park Racetrack for the Summer Movies Race.  Who will win, place or show?  Place your bets, folks. 

Annnnddd....they're off!  Iron Man 2 takes the lead but here comes Robin Hood close and on the outside.  Followed by Shrek Forever After in the green silks.  Sex and the City 2 is fourth but look out for Prince of Persia on the dark horse! 

The summer movies are coming and it is anyone's race to win.  The major studios are betting big and we, the movie going public are betting as well.  Winner take all!  The L A Times reported on a brand new way to lose your shirt.  Selling stocks on the movies.  Not the studios but the movies they make.  After the sterling record Wall Street has given us lately, NOTHING CAN WRONG HERE

I am a rank (unranked, really.) amateur and I know enough not to buy stock in the movies.  Why?  How many of us remember previous "sure things" from 2009:

•    Land of the Lost: Cost $100 million to make and made half that.
•    Funny People:  Adam Sandler!  Seth Rogen!  Pure....lead
•    Year One: Unfunny TRAILER equals unfunny movie.
•    I Love You Beth Cooper:  No one saw Beth Cooper let alone loved her.

Think about this.  What large studio in memory ever trotted out a picture and then spent millions saying:  STAY AWAY!  Toxic Movie!  Do not see this!  Fast answer is none.  Now add in betting.  Or stocks, I mean. 

I can picture the following :

"Bill?  John at Hee Hee Americade.  Hey, I got a hot stock.  Golden.  New film.  Called "Babies."  Yeah.  It is about four babies from around the world and they follow them around for a year.  Hey!  Let me shoot you the trailer.
So, how much do you want to buy?  Hello?  Hello?"

Ok.  Cuteness squared but other than doing huge business in Utah County, who is this film for?  I can predict a theatre full of women but where are the guys?  Oh? And did the broker tell you it opens the same weekend as Iron Man 2?  He didn't?  SUCKER!  

 After you pay for a sitter, parking and concessions, you are into a movie pretty deep anyway.  Why compound going to movies by investing in stocks?  If a movie sucks, all you lose is the money you spent going and the two hours involved.  Nothing more.    

Remember, Kids, vote for a movie with your feet not your retirement or kids college money.

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